NBA analysts designs comical new stats for Wemby's constant absurdities

Victor Wembanyama is changing the game right before our eyes. His offense has been jaw-dropping this season, but the defense is mind-bending in its own right. So much so, we're still trying to figure out how to quantify what he's doing three years into his career. On ESPN's basketball talk show, NBA Today, David Dennis Jr. unveiled the stats he created to describe what he's seeing in San Antonio.

To be fair to whoever created it first, I've heard others suggest a "Hell Nah" stat before, but the other two are brand new to me. I like all of these metrics, though. David isn't exaggerating with any of them. We're all victims of laughing maniacally, watching this man do the unbelievable things he does on a nightly basis. We've said "we've never seen this before" ad nauseam, and we're going to continue to say it.

Watching Wemby is an experience

No matter who the opponent is, you're in for a good time when you sit down to watch Vic play basketball. It's fun, and every game, you laugh at how extravagant it is to observe in real time. It doesn't happen every now and then. It happens often. So, giving the act an individual stat is fine with me.

I can get behind the Wemby, but it has to be amended to specify that the block has to be at the rim. No blocks on three-point attempts, leading to threes on the other end. It's easier for guards and wings to get in then. What makes the stat unique is that it's rare for guys capable of protecting the rim to also be the ones bringing the ball up and splashing a transition three because they're usually centers.

But any guard or wing like Mikal Bridges, or, God forbid, Dillon Brooks, could block an outside shot and get one on the other end. We're not going to be giving guys like that a nod in The Wemby stat category.

The Hell Nah might need to be called something a little more family-friendly if we're actually going to make this one a real stat. There should be serious consideration surrounding this topic. It's unbelievable to watch professional NBA players decide to reset their offense or turn the ball over rather than challenge the Alien at the rim.

Whatever the final name is, the NBA needs a way to track the impact he has on offenses on those plays. They happen way too often to ignore.